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I’m on to them, and now they know it.

July 7, 2011

Them? Who them you say? Why of course I’m referring to the technology in my life, and I fear I may be too late to stop it. Call me twitchy if you want, and no I don’t have all the answers yet, but I’m fairly sure I’m living with my own Skynet. (Eyes on you buddy, eyes. on. you.)

Let me give you a brief timeline, then you be the judge:

5 weeks ago – my microwave blows up with an earth-shattering kaboom.

4 weeks ago – repairman (minion?) comes to the house, attempts repair. Installs new controller board and another board (unknown what this board does, repair minion was very vague). Microwave still not working. Or is it just not working for me?

June 23rd – co-worker (minion?) nabs my umbrella at Ribfest, setting the stage for me being trapped in a June 24th deluge. With my iPhone. I *thought* said phone was in a water-proof pocket, but ‘somehow’ the protective flap got turned in to the pocket, turning it into a phone swimming pool. As I removed the dripping phone from my pocket it let out a sqwonk/bink, which I believe was an encoded signal to the other machines in my life. I know for sure my laptop was nearby…

June 26th – after a 3-day rice bath I attempt to power up my phone. It lives!…almost. As soon as I touch the power button it reports ‘no SIM’ meaning it’s no longer on the regular network, AND it’s impossible to turn off!

June 27th – take the iPhone to my ‘cell phone guy’ who works on it (in the back, out of sight) for about 40 minutes, all the time telling me he has very little hope. Phone is rescued. He explains that the rice bath wasn’t the best thing to do, I should have brought him the phone right away. I think this would just mean they had access to the phone three days earlier. (I hate to say it but he might be a minion.)

June 28th Power outage. Sure it looked stormy, and it did eventually rain, but we have underground power lines here, and there was nary a drop of rain and very little lightning when the power died, twice. What were the machines up to while the power was ‘out’? 

June 29th – laptop is acting flakey so I decide to back up my data. External HD is detected once and named with a bunch of double-byte characters, then never detected again. Plugging it in results in a ‘Hardware did not install correctly’ error. Backup not accomplished. I think the drive had its own agenda, and no time to deal with my trivial requests.

June 30th – the OS on my laptop DIES. Interestingly enough it will boot to safe mode with no network connectivity (or at least no network we know of) but any other attempts result in ‘Fatal System Error’ when Windows login is attempted. Who hijacked my OS and what were they doing with it?

I’d hoped this was just an attempt to keep me off-line while I was mid-move. Unfortunately that doesn’t appear to be the case:

July 7th – I’m back to work today with the newly installed OS and yet I’m still unable to perform a Windows search. Any attempt results in Explorer shutting down. What is it I’m not supposed to find? (Well, besides everything since I CAN’T SEARCH)

Now? I keep digging and chronicling. I don’t have much hope anyone will read this, I mean even if ‘they’ let me hit publish, how will I know it’s really available? Will they let this message get out or just let me think they did?

2 Comments leave one →
  1. Anita permalink
    July 7, 2011 2:38 pm

    LOL….I have a ‘sketchy’ computer at home that decides when the screen will be visible or not. It will provide an occasional flash prior to taking a 5-er. At work, my computer keeps locking when I try to use my graphic text mode on WordPerfect and then it won’t open. if you you look into properties, it shows it’s running fine but the whole thing freezes and the entire thing will freeze after. IT conspiracy – I think so!!! As for the cell phone, I don’t have one but hubby consistently insists he didn’t feel it vibrating when I call but I think that is selective nerve conduction *g*

  2. July 7, 2011 3:22 pm

    maybe it’s Saber Industries. Watch out for a lean mean ginea pig fighting team heading your way…

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